My Approach to Fertility Counseling

The Calm & Cherish therapeutic process enhances the mind-body connection, reduces physical manifestations of trauma, incorporates cognitive therapy to challenge negative beliefs, and strengthens the support system with a spouse or partner. I model treatment methods after the latest research, which clearly and consistently proves the connection between stress reduction and positive pregnancy outcomes. Below are the various techniques I use, and when combined, offer an all encompassing service that can aid in positive fertility outcomes.

Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) / Somatic Therapy

MBSR and Somatic Therapy have been proven to play an important role in supporting better fertility outcomes. These types of therapy play an important role in creating the mental, emotional, and physiological conditions that support better fertility outcomes. They assist in reducing stress, promoting relaxation and decreasing inflammation, and enhancing an overall sense of well-being—all of which are important factors for reproductive health. Using somatic techniques, we focus on the mind-body connection, particularly around issues related to stress, trauma, emotional blockages, and physical tension that can interfere with reproductive health. 

  • 1. Reducing Stress and Enhancing Relaxation

    Chronic stress is one of the biggest obstacles to fertility, as it can disrupt hormonal balance, interfere with ovulation, and cause inflammation in body. Somatic therapy helps reduce stress by encouraging mindfulness and body awareness, which can activate the parasympathetic nervous system (the "rest and digest" system), leading to relaxation and improved overall well-being.

    • How it helps: By practicing techniques like breathing exercises, body scans, and grounding movements, somatic therapy helps calm the nervous system, reducing the physical effects of stress (like muscle tension and elevated cortisol levels). When your body is in a more relaxed state, it can function more optimally, which supports fertility.

    2. Supporting the Nervous System for Reproductive Health

    The autonomic nervous system, which regulates bodily functions like heart rate, digestion, and hormonal secretion, plays a significant role in reproductive health. Chronic stress can dysregulate the nervous system, leading to hormonal imbalances that can affect menstrual cycles, ovulation, and sperm production.

    • How it helps: Somatic therapy uses relaxation techniques to help re-regulate the nervous system. For example, deep breathing or guided body awareness exercises help activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which can restore balance to the body's stress response and improve hormonal regulation. This creates a more favorable environment for conception and a more balanced reproductive system.

    3. Improving Sleep

    Fertility issues are often accompanied by sleep disturbances, whether due to stress, hormonal imbalances, or physical discomfort. Good quality sleep is essential for hormonal regulation, particularly for reproductive hormones like estrogen and progesterone.

    • How it works: MBSR promotes relaxation techniques that can improve sleep quality. Better sleep helps with the natural hormonal rhythms necessary for conception and can enhance the effectiveness of fertility treatments

    4. Enhancing Mind-Body Connection

    Fertility issues are often seen as a purely physical problem, but there is a growing understanding that the mind and body are deeply interconnected. Chronic stress, anxiety, and emotional strain can manifest physically and interfere with the body’s natural processes, including reproduction.

    • How it works: MBSR/somatic techniques teaches awareness of the body and encourages participants to be attuned to their physical sensations without judgment. By fostering a healthier relationship between mind and body, mindfulness practices may help reduce tension and improve physical health, which can positively affect fertility.

    5. Supporting the Release of Physical Tension

    Physical tension in the body, particularly in the pelvic region, lower back, or abdomen, can be a result of stress, anxiety, or past trauma. Chronic tension can interfere with reproductive organs and the natural processes needed for conception.

    • How it helps: Somatic therapy uses techniques like gentle movement, stretching, or body scanning to bring awareness to areas of tension and encourage their release. This can reduce physical discomfort and promote better circulation and relaxation in the reproductive organs. For women, this can mean reduced pelvic tension, which may improve menstrual cycles or the success of fertility treatments. For men, it may help reduce stress-related factors that impact sperm quality.

    6. Addressing the Mind-Body Disconnect in Fertility

    For many people, fertility struggles can lead to a sense of disconnection between their mind and body. They may feel frustrated or helpless in their attempts to conceive, or they may experience a lack of trust in their body’s ability to function properly. Somatic therapy bridges this gap by bringing attention to the body’s natural rhythms and helping individuals feel more in tune with their physical and emotional states.

    • How it helps: Somatic therapy helps individuals reconnect with their body’s signals and regain a sense of trust in their own ability to heal. Through mindfulness practices and somatic techniques, individuals are encouraged to listen to their body’s needs and responses, helping them approach fertility with greater ease, patience, and trust in the process.

    7. Improving Coping Skills

    Dealing with fertility struggles can be overwhelming, and many people experience a sense of loss of control. MBSR teaches individuals how to respond to challenges with greater resilience, cultivating patience, tolerance, and a sense of groundedness.

    • How it works: By practicing mindfulness, individuals can approach difficult emotions and experiences with a sense of equanimity, reducing the psychological burden of fertility struggles and helping them make informed, calm decisions during their journey..

    8. Creating a Mindful Fertility Practice

    Somatic therapy often incorporates mindfulness practices that encourage living in the present moment, without excessive worry about the future or regret about the past. Mindfulness can support fertility by reducing anxiety and negative thought patterns, which can have a profound impact on overall reproductive health.

    • How it helps: Mindful practices in somatic therapy allow individuals to cultivate a deeper acceptance of their fertility journey. Instead of focusing on the outcome (pregnancy), the focus shifts to self-care, emotional healing, and body awareness, helping individuals stay grounded and present throughout the process.

Narrative Therapy

Narrative Therapy helps reduce emotional distress and a personal sense of failure, and fosters a sense of hope and self-love on the fertility journey, which can improve outcomes.

    1. Re-Storying the Fertility Journey – Narrative Therapy allows individuals to reconstruct their fertility story, shifting the focus from self-blame or failure to empowerment and possibility.

    2. Externalizing the Problem – By separating infertility from personal identity (e.g., "infertility is something I’m facing" rather than "I am infertile"), individuals regain a sense of agency and control.

    3. Shifting Negative Beliefs about One’s Body – Often, women go through a lifetime of receiving judgments and criticisms about their bodies before they are able to shift these narratives. In this phase of therapy, we work to release the negative beliefs that have gotten “stuck” along the way about your physical body, clearing the way for feelings of strength, acceptance, and powerful self-love. 

    4. Finding Meaning Beyond the Outcome – Narrative Therapy helps individuals redefine success, creating a broader sense of fulfillment beyond pregnancy alone, which can alleviate pressure and promote mental well-being.

    5. Highlight areas for further mind-body work - Narrative Therapy can uncover deeply triggering thoughts and feelings. This can serve as an important indicator of further MBSR or somatic therapy work for client and therapist.

Couples EFT / Gottman / Contextual Therapy

Used briefly during our treatment method, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples, The Gottman Method Couples Therapy, and Contextual Therapy can positively contribute to fertility efforts by strengthening emotional bonds, reducing stress, and improving communication between partners during the fertility journey. Your relationships are important. Briefly working together as a couple (or alongside a support person) helps to enhance your overall well-being, which can positively impact fertility outcomes and the journey toward parenthood. Different couples therapy methods are used as needed, based on the unique needs of the clients.


  • EFT is highly effective in bridging the gap between couples - a gap that can widen significantly during the process of Trying To Conceive. Members of a couple work to identify their conflict patterns, explore the deeper emotions and needs beneath these conflict styles, and work to foster closeness and create a secure attachment with one another.

  • The Gottman Method Couples Therapy serves to address and strengthen key components of healthy relationships. This includes exploring your shared meaning of life together, working through “gridlocked” conflicts that go unresolved, improving communication, and deepening intimacy. Refining these areas of focus can make a big difference during the fertility journey.

  • Contextual Therapy can be used to strengthen relationships between spouses, members of a family, or other types of relationships. This type of therapy works to strengthen relationships by taking into account their environmental contexts, exploring accountability and forgiveness, and strengthening connections. Helping members of a couple or support system feel encouraged and connected provides physical and emotional benefits, which can improve pregnancy outcomes.

Get Started

Request a consultation below and fill out the form. This provides me everything I need to know to get you set up. I will reach out to set up your first appointment.

I offer same-day appointments for clients with scheduled fertility procedures and with written permission, I also like to connect with your doctor/midwife/OB during this process, so I can better understand your journey and coordinate care efficiently.

Whether we meet in my office or via Zoom, I hold a safe, calming space for all clients.